KyubiNaruto said:
Well okay, explain the situation/story to me as to why you had to flip off a mennonite. This sounds like it could be a good laugh or two.
it was just a bunch of little things that kept adding up i guess...last week i lost a good friend so my fuse has been kinda short for the last few days.
this morning i had to transfer some $ to a friend's account...simple? nope...the teller was incompetent then there was a problem on the other end and they tried to call that bank...has anyone tried to reach an actual person at a bank? can't be done...they frittered away about an hour of my life before i had to leave to get back home to meet the meter reader.(don't even get me started on the hassle i went though to get them to agree to a specific time.)
apparently the utility company thinks that anytime between 8 am and 4 pm should be good enough for their customers...what else are we going to do anyways...usually sitting around all day with my thumb up my *** wouldn't bother me but i had other things to do today....did i mention the reason for needing someone to come and read my meter? the moron who read it last month wrote down the wrong # and they billed me for more water than lake erie currently contains.
i turned down my street(with 15 minutes to spare to meet the scheduled rendevous) and drive by a guy who looks exactly like the meter reader...he was driving a city utility truck AWAY from the direction of my house...on my door there is a note "you missed our appointment...i waited 15 minutes...please reschedule...signed meter man" it also had a time written down....meter men must live in some wierd future dimension because the time written on the note was off by 1/2 an hour...i asked my neighbour, who was weeding her garden, about the guy who just drove away...she said "oh him? he just pulled up 2 minutes ago...wrote something on a piece of paper and left"
back to the bank...i spent enough time in there this visit that i would have been better off just withdrawing the cash and driving 2 hours to toronto to deposit the $ in her account.
i am getting hungry by now so i went to a burger joint drive thru...i order a bacon cheesburger with NO ONIONS...i repeated myself twice just to be sure the vapid girl taking my order understood that i really didn't want onions...i am 10 minutes down the road rushing to make my last appointment of the day...i open the burger...no bacon-the pig made a run for it...no cheese and ONIONS LOT'S and LOT'S of ONIONS!!!
i think it was about then that my nervous tic came back....i know i am going to be late...i hate being late...i pull up to a stop light behind a mennonite's horse and buggy...light turns green and i wait...and i wait some more..and then i went ape****!! i laid on the horn stuck my head out the window and screamed...."kick that ****ing horse in the *** and get around the ****ing corner or i am coming up there and kicking the nag myself"....mennonite makes it around the corner...light turns red...i know i was foaming at the mouth because i recall looking in the mirror....the light turns green and the moron behind me has the nerve to toot his horn at me....i didn't have time to kill him right then, but i did get his licence #...i metally added him to my list....i caught up to the horse and buggy a block later and as i drove by i
GAVE THE MENNONITE THE FINGER
you know the little cartoon devil and angel that sits on your shoulder and whispers in your ear?...homer simpson has them...bugs bunny has them...superdave has them too....about a mile down the road i hear a whisper in my ear..."dude that was hardcore"...it was the little devil toon...i lost it...i started laughing so hard i had to put the 4 ways on and just sit there...i just about regained my composure and was getting ready to move on when the mennonite in the horse and buggy passed me...it was a 13 or 14 year old girl and she was looking at me like i had 2 heads....i smiled at her and waved....the little angel toon whispered in my ear..."dude you are going to hell and there is nothing i can do to help you".