The Ancients make Patriarch
Talic, Korlic, and Madawc make Patriarch
Toothy grin spread so wide that your cheeks hurt…burning retinas now incapable of focusing…inexplicable smell of singed hair violating your nostrils…odd tingling sensation in the crotch region…
No, you haven’t been assaulted by the half-clothed hedonistic goddess of Candy Land and her hounds of morphine (whatever that means); you’ve just stumbled into a thread so overloaded with awesome that your senses are still in shock. Take deep breaths and read on at your own peril.
Liqarus! Once again you fly us too close to the sun.
Well slather on the SPF 2000 because this time I’ve brought a couple of compatriots along for the ascent.
Melodramatic/Unnecessary Intro
The three warriors had stood together for ages, protecting the entrance to the Worldstone Keep. Eternally watchful and vigilant, they defeated every challenger that wished to pass. Hundreds of able-bodied adventurers gave it their all in a chance for everlasting glory, but none would ever taste that victory. As the years dragged on, and with every would-be hero thrown from the summit, fewer and fewer attempts at besting the Ancients were made. Out of fear, the trickle of champions at last slowed to a stop. Having found none that were worthy, the Ancients left behind their sacred duties and abandoned their post to finish the three Prime Evils themselves. This is their story.
TL
R Intro
This is a triple Barbarian Patriarch thread highlighting the adventures of Talic, Korlic, and Madawc (or rather, our interpretations of them).
Let’s meet the players, shall we?
[highlight]Ray Patean[/highlight] as Talic –Whirlwind
[highlight]Zylo[/highlight] as Korlic –Leap Attack
[highlight]Liquid Evil[/highlight] as Madawc –Double Throw
Since there was no reason to double up on war cries, we each utilized a different one. I, as Madawc, was the most straightforward and was left in charge of Shout simply to keep in theme. Talic was relegated as the man responsible for Battle Orders, and Korlic locked up monsters (to better aim his Leap Attack) with War Cry.
What items did you each utilize?
Talic
Helm: Arreat’s Face
Amulet: Highlord’s Wrath
Armor: “Fortitude” Archon
Weapon: 1.07 Ethereal Indestructible “Grief” and “Beast” Berserker Axes
Gloves: Steelrend
Rings: Raven Frost/Dual Leech and Resists
Belt: Thundergod’s Vigor
Boots: Gore Riders
Weapon Switch: “Call to Arms” and “Heart of the Oak”
Charms: damage, AR, resists, and life
Korlic
Helm: Arreat’s Face
Amulet: Highlord’s Wrath
Armor: Leviathan
Weapon: Tomb Reaver
Gloves: Dracul’s Grasp
Rings: Raven Frost/10% FC, +AR, resist rare ring
Belt: String of Ears
Boots: Goreriders
Weapon Switch: Dual Wizardspikes
Charms: resists, life, and a Mastery skiller
Madawc
Helm: Giant Skull
Amulet: Highlord’s Wrath
Armor: “Fortitude” Archon
Weapons: ethereal Lacerator, ethereal Gargoyle’s Bite
Gloves: Laying of Hands
Rings: Raven Frost/Dual leech rare
Belt: Razortail
Boots: Triple resist rares
Weapon Switch: Lacerator and Gargoyle’s Bite (non-eth)
Charms: damage, life, and resists
What are the end game stats of your Ancients?
Here’s a dual LCS for each Ancient: one with the benefits of only one another, one a shot with mercenary aid. (Click the merc if you like the bigger LCS numbers)
Talic (w/ merc)
Korlic (w/ merc)
Madawc (w/ merc)
What mercs did you guys use?
Talic: Act 2 Might merc with “Pride” polearm (Offense)
Korlic: Act 2 Holy Freeze merc with Reaper’s Toll (Safety)
Madawc: Act 1 merc with Windforce (Range)
Why level 87?
Because that’s the mlvl of the Ancients so it seemed a fitting stopping point.
I bet it was swell being an Ancient. How was the leveling?
I’ve compiled a surplus of photographs that document key aspects of their trip through the game so people like you can live vicariously through the thread. (read: I took enough screenshots to choke a porpoise, so you’re gonna be subjected to a slew. Enjoi.)
We begin. Then, it’s off through the game: Normal Catacombs, Normal Andy, Normal Tomb, Normal Mephisto, Normal Minions, Normal Baal, Nightmare Act IV, Nightmare Diablo, Nightmare Arreat Plateau, Nightmare Baal, Hell Sewers, Hell Radament, Hell Izual, Hell Crystalline Passage, and Hell Anya.
And if that wasn’t enough, let me present to you an excerpt from Madawc’s journal, detailing his quest through Hell.
Day 1: Today we began our journey. The killing was easy and my comrades and I were quick to bond over the slaughter. Our warrior blood unites us as kindred spirits, and I can tell from Talic’s watchful gaze that he is very fond of me. Korlic is quite the jokester and we had a ripping good laugh when he stepped on my heel causing my Barbarian foot to leave my boot. “Flat tire!” he screamed; oh, it was a riot. His singing also provides us with sweet relieve from the constant monster slaying. He does perhaps the best rendition of “Ninety-nine bottles of beer” that I’ve ever heard. Much merriment was had by all and it was a great day. I can honestly say that I hope this trip never ends.
Night 1: The sun set quickly so we decided to bed down in a crudely-fashioned hovel. However, I rose just shortly after we had settled in for the night for I had been awakened by the unruly and unmistakable cry of Sabre Cat in heat. The outrageous roar made me rise from my slumber in full battle gear, hurling spears into the darkness in a panicked attempt to euthanize the source. Talic stifled my actions and pointed me to the actual cause of the clamor. Twas just dear Korlic’s sleep noise. Since I was already up, I set to work crafting Grim Wards about the makeshift camp to keep any actual Sabre Cats at bay. When the snoring finally subsided nearing 4 in the morning, Talic led me back to bed where he promised to watch over me. True to his word, whenever I stirred from sleep, I was greeted with his reassuring (and unblinking) stare.
Day 2: Talic was quick to prepare breakfast this morning, and handed me the lion’s share of the fried Thorned Hulk entrails with a wink. Although terribly woody and chalked with splinters, he did the best with what he had, and for that, I commended him on this otherwise unpalatable meal. Korlic also wasted no time in serenading us with “digestion music.” Ninety-nine bottles of beer later and we were off once again on our quest to save humanity from the minions of destruction.
Night 4: Talic had another of his bad dreams tonight, and I daresay that it has become something of a regular occurrence. Apparently the poor soul is plagued with constant nightmares and finds it best to share my sleeping bag to feel the presence of another warrior next to his body. I’ve relegated myself to watch duty since I cannot sleep over Korlic’s snoring anyway. I’ve gotten quite good at crafting my Grim Wards.
Day 6: I can appreciate the occasional jest, but my heel is getting rather raw. Nevertheless, I still laugh along with Korlic in an attempt to humor him. My back is also askew, though not from the constant battles with monsters, but rather because Talic is a bedhog and has forced me to the cold, zipper-side of the bag during these past three nights. I pray that sleep deprivation doesn’t become a factor.
Night 6: Sleep deprivation has become a factor.
Day 19: We haven’t seen a Thorned Hulk in over two weeks, yet the breakfast menu has surprisingly remained unchanged. I haven’t the heart to tell poor Talic, who fancies himself as somewhat of a culinary expert, that my belches are pure sawdust and my stool is little more than wood pulp. Still, we march ever onward in our effort to end humanity’s greatest threat. I take comfort knowing that my meager sufferings are so insignificant when compared to the sufferings of those who have died at the hands of the Prime Evils.
Day 24: My feet are now too swollen to wear boots and even the fresh blood on my heels doesn’t seem to deter Korlic from giving me more “flat tires.” Part of my training at Mount Arreat consisted of honing my ability to resist torture if Baal’s minions were ever to overtake me, but if I hear “Ninety-nine bottles of beer” even one more time, I’m going to puke. (And I am very loathe to experience anymore puking than I otherwise do after our breakfasts.)
Night 24: Korlic has ceased to snore but now instead hums that song in his sleep. My body lets out a dry heave at each and every accursed beer bottle refrain.
Day 32: Must kill Baal. Must save the world. Must kill Baal. Must save the world. Must not kill comrades in their sleep. Must not kill comrades in their sleep. Must not disembowel Korlic with my axe. Must not bludgeon Talic with his skillet and toss his corpse from my sleeping bag. Keep it together Mawdy…can’t be that much further.
-End of Journal-
I didn’t read all that.
For shame.
Any good drops?
Nothing wildly awesome, and of course Baal had to drop his usual, but here are the individual HF drops in Hell:
Talic’s, Madawc’s, & Korlic’s (and some color commentary)
(On our final Baal run together, the game dropped this in thanks.)
So did you beat the quest Ancients on every difficulty multiple times?
Of course! Here’s some Ancient-on-Ancient action for the SPF’s masochist population (I’m looking at you VoX Dei).
Normal: Start, Finish
Nightmare: Start, Finish
Hell: Start, Finish
Can my character fight your Ancients?
Sure.
What? Really? I can fight them?
Yup. We’d like to give everyone that wants some Ancient ears a chance to collect a set because we realize that beating a super-charged, human-controlled cluster of Ancients could be quite rewarding for some of you. These characters were made and geared for PvM-play, but anyone that is interested in testing his/her mettle against a real game challenge can join a game we will be hosting on sometime this weekend. If you’re interested and would like to stop by for a brawl, voice your interest in this MP thread. All the details are posted there. (That’s also the place to direct MP/duel questions—try your best to keep the fighting queries out of this Pat thread.)
I’m gonna join and get ten sets of ears!
By all means.
Epic.
Indeed.
Any thoughts you’d like to leave us with?
-Gargoyle’s Bite had a teensy weensy stack size totaling a mere 80 spears. That meant I had to switch back and forth between my weapons fairly frequently so the other set could take a break and replenish (or just flat out run to town for a quick repair). I love the range of spears, and that’s the main reason I didn’t use two Lacerators, but I would never again utilize a Gargoyle’s Bite on a throwing character.
-A set of three characters working in tandem could really plow through the game at times. It took us just two gaming sessions to approach level 70 and defeat Nightmare Baal (with several pauses for upgrading the twink gear). As the project progressed we saw that getting three SP D2’ers online at the same time could sometimes prove difficult.
-Deaths were few and far between. We had a bit of trouble in Nightmare when we were biting off more than we could chew. This was in part because we had sped through the beginning game so (relatively) quickly. For the most part though, we did a good job at looking out for one another.
-I will never again attempt to host this many screenshots.
-These characters are dripping in more awesomeness than a pair of the Fonz’s briefs. (Gross)
Thanks
-Zylo and Ray Patean, for agreeing to this project and being so enthusiastic about it. Good show.
-Dark Chaos, gedda-d-e, and sirpoopsalot for a couple of nice throwing items that helped Madawc make it through the game.
-cloudy, just out of habit.
-Zylo also thanks Ipsilantee and Cygnus for various wares.
-Ray thanks his parents for blessing him with such righteous genes.
TLR Conclusion
By incorporating teammates, I took the usual Liq bar and raised it by a factor of three. Didn’t think it could be done? Well believe it. This thread is saturated in so much awesome that this post alone would be able to sustain an entire army of breast-powered robots.
Talic, Korlic, and Madawc make Patriarch
Toothy grin spread so wide that your cheeks hurt…burning retinas now incapable of focusing…inexplicable smell of singed hair violating your nostrils…odd tingling sensation in the crotch region…
No, you haven’t been assaulted by the half-clothed hedonistic goddess of Candy Land and her hounds of morphine (whatever that means); you’ve just stumbled into a thread so overloaded with awesome that your senses are still in shock. Take deep breaths and read on at your own peril.
Liqarus! Once again you fly us too close to the sun.
Well slather on the SPF 2000 because this time I’ve brought a couple of compatriots along for the ascent.
Melodramatic/Unnecessary Intro
The three warriors had stood together for ages, protecting the entrance to the Worldstone Keep. Eternally watchful and vigilant, they defeated every challenger that wished to pass. Hundreds of able-bodied adventurers gave it their all in a chance for everlasting glory, but none would ever taste that victory. As the years dragged on, and with every would-be hero thrown from the summit, fewer and fewer attempts at besting the Ancients were made. Out of fear, the trickle of champions at last slowed to a stop. Having found none that were worthy, the Ancients left behind their sacred duties and abandoned their post to finish the three Prime Evils themselves. This is their story.
TL
R IntroThis is a triple Barbarian Patriarch thread highlighting the adventures of Talic, Korlic, and Madawc (or rather, our interpretations of them).
Let’s meet the players, shall we?
[highlight]Ray Patean[/highlight] as Talic –Whirlwind
[highlight]Zylo[/highlight] as Korlic –Leap Attack
[highlight]Liquid Evil[/highlight] as Madawc –Double Throw
Since there was no reason to double up on war cries, we each utilized a different one. I, as Madawc, was the most straightforward and was left in charge of Shout simply to keep in theme. Talic was relegated as the man responsible for Battle Orders, and Korlic locked up monsters (to better aim his Leap Attack) with War Cry.
What items did you each utilize?
Talic
Helm: Arreat’s Face
Amulet: Highlord’s Wrath
Armor: “Fortitude” Archon
Weapon: 1.07 Ethereal Indestructible “Grief” and “Beast” Berserker Axes
Gloves: Steelrend
Rings: Raven Frost/Dual Leech and Resists
Belt: Thundergod’s Vigor
Boots: Gore Riders
Weapon Switch: “Call to Arms” and “Heart of the Oak”
Charms: damage, AR, resists, and life
Korlic
Helm: Arreat’s Face
Amulet: Highlord’s Wrath
Armor: Leviathan
Weapon: Tomb Reaver
Gloves: Dracul’s Grasp
Rings: Raven Frost/10% FC, +AR, resist rare ring
Belt: String of Ears
Boots: Goreriders
Weapon Switch: Dual Wizardspikes
Charms: resists, life, and a Mastery skiller
Madawc
Helm: Giant Skull
Amulet: Highlord’s Wrath
Armor: “Fortitude” Archon
Weapons: ethereal Lacerator, ethereal Gargoyle’s Bite
Gloves: Laying of Hands
Rings: Raven Frost/Dual leech rare
Belt: Razortail
Boots: Triple resist rares
Weapon Switch: Lacerator and Gargoyle’s Bite (non-eth)
Charms: damage, life, and resists
What are the end game stats of your Ancients?
Here’s a dual LCS for each Ancient: one with the benefits of only one another, one a shot with mercenary aid. (Click the merc if you like the bigger LCS numbers)
Talic (w/ merc)
Korlic (w/ merc)
Madawc (w/ merc)
What mercs did you guys use?
Talic: Act 2 Might merc with “Pride” polearm (Offense)
Korlic: Act 2 Holy Freeze merc with Reaper’s Toll (Safety)
Madawc: Act 1 merc with Windforce (Range)
Why level 87?
Because that’s the mlvl of the Ancients so it seemed a fitting stopping point.
I bet it was swell being an Ancient. How was the leveling?
I’ve compiled a surplus of photographs that document key aspects of their trip through the game so people like you can live vicariously through the thread. (read: I took enough screenshots to choke a porpoise, so you’re gonna be subjected to a slew. Enjoi.)
We begin. Then, it’s off through the game: Normal Catacombs, Normal Andy, Normal Tomb, Normal Mephisto, Normal Minions, Normal Baal, Nightmare Act IV, Nightmare Diablo, Nightmare Arreat Plateau, Nightmare Baal, Hell Sewers, Hell Radament, Hell Izual, Hell Crystalline Passage, and Hell Anya.
And if that wasn’t enough, let me present to you an excerpt from Madawc’s journal, detailing his quest through Hell.
Day 1: Today we began our journey. The killing was easy and my comrades and I were quick to bond over the slaughter. Our warrior blood unites us as kindred spirits, and I can tell from Talic’s watchful gaze that he is very fond of me. Korlic is quite the jokester and we had a ripping good laugh when he stepped on my heel causing my Barbarian foot to leave my boot. “Flat tire!” he screamed; oh, it was a riot. His singing also provides us with sweet relieve from the constant monster slaying. He does perhaps the best rendition of “Ninety-nine bottles of beer” that I’ve ever heard. Much merriment was had by all and it was a great day. I can honestly say that I hope this trip never ends.
Night 1: The sun set quickly so we decided to bed down in a crudely-fashioned hovel. However, I rose just shortly after we had settled in for the night for I had been awakened by the unruly and unmistakable cry of Sabre Cat in heat. The outrageous roar made me rise from my slumber in full battle gear, hurling spears into the darkness in a panicked attempt to euthanize the source. Talic stifled my actions and pointed me to the actual cause of the clamor. Twas just dear Korlic’s sleep noise. Since I was already up, I set to work crafting Grim Wards about the makeshift camp to keep any actual Sabre Cats at bay. When the snoring finally subsided nearing 4 in the morning, Talic led me back to bed where he promised to watch over me. True to his word, whenever I stirred from sleep, I was greeted with his reassuring (and unblinking) stare.
Day 2: Talic was quick to prepare breakfast this morning, and handed me the lion’s share of the fried Thorned Hulk entrails with a wink. Although terribly woody and chalked with splinters, he did the best with what he had, and for that, I commended him on this otherwise unpalatable meal. Korlic also wasted no time in serenading us with “digestion music.” Ninety-nine bottles of beer later and we were off once again on our quest to save humanity from the minions of destruction.
Night 4: Talic had another of his bad dreams tonight, and I daresay that it has become something of a regular occurrence. Apparently the poor soul is plagued with constant nightmares and finds it best to share my sleeping bag to feel the presence of another warrior next to his body. I’ve relegated myself to watch duty since I cannot sleep over Korlic’s snoring anyway. I’ve gotten quite good at crafting my Grim Wards.
Day 6: I can appreciate the occasional jest, but my heel is getting rather raw. Nevertheless, I still laugh along with Korlic in an attempt to humor him. My back is also askew, though not from the constant battles with monsters, but rather because Talic is a bedhog and has forced me to the cold, zipper-side of the bag during these past three nights. I pray that sleep deprivation doesn’t become a factor.
Night 6: Sleep deprivation has become a factor.
Day 19: We haven’t seen a Thorned Hulk in over two weeks, yet the breakfast menu has surprisingly remained unchanged. I haven’t the heart to tell poor Talic, who fancies himself as somewhat of a culinary expert, that my belches are pure sawdust and my stool is little more than wood pulp. Still, we march ever onward in our effort to end humanity’s greatest threat. I take comfort knowing that my meager sufferings are so insignificant when compared to the sufferings of those who have died at the hands of the Prime Evils.
Day 24: My feet are now too swollen to wear boots and even the fresh blood on my heels doesn’t seem to deter Korlic from giving me more “flat tires.” Part of my training at Mount Arreat consisted of honing my ability to resist torture if Baal’s minions were ever to overtake me, but if I hear “Ninety-nine bottles of beer” even one more time, I’m going to puke. (And I am very loathe to experience anymore puking than I otherwise do after our breakfasts.)
Night 24: Korlic has ceased to snore but now instead hums that song in his sleep. My body lets out a dry heave at each and every accursed beer bottle refrain.
Day 32: Must kill Baal. Must save the world. Must kill Baal. Must save the world. Must not kill comrades in their sleep. Must not kill comrades in their sleep. Must not disembowel Korlic with my axe. Must not bludgeon Talic with his skillet and toss his corpse from my sleeping bag. Keep it together Mawdy…can’t be that much further.
-End of Journal-
I didn’t read all that.
For shame.
Any good drops?
Nothing wildly awesome, and of course Baal had to drop his usual, but here are the individual HF drops in Hell:
Talic’s, Madawc’s, & Korlic’s (and some color commentary)
(On our final Baal run together, the game dropped this in thanks.)
So did you beat the quest Ancients on every difficulty multiple times?
Of course! Here’s some Ancient-on-Ancient action for the SPF’s masochist population (I’m looking at you VoX Dei).
Normal: Start, Finish
Nightmare: Start, Finish
Hell: Start, Finish
Can my character fight your Ancients?
Sure.
What? Really? I can fight them?
Yup. We’d like to give everyone that wants some Ancient ears a chance to collect a set because we realize that beating a super-charged, human-controlled cluster of Ancients could be quite rewarding for some of you. These characters were made and geared for PvM-play, but anyone that is interested in testing his/her mettle against a real game challenge can join a game we will be hosting on sometime this weekend. If you’re interested and would like to stop by for a brawl, voice your interest in this MP thread. All the details are posted there. (That’s also the place to direct MP/duel questions—try your best to keep the fighting queries out of this Pat thread.)
I’m gonna join and get ten sets of ears!
By all means.
Epic.
Indeed.
Any thoughts you’d like to leave us with?
-Gargoyle’s Bite had a teensy weensy stack size totaling a mere 80 spears. That meant I had to switch back and forth between my weapons fairly frequently so the other set could take a break and replenish (or just flat out run to town for a quick repair). I love the range of spears, and that’s the main reason I didn’t use two Lacerators, but I would never again utilize a Gargoyle’s Bite on a throwing character.
-A set of three characters working in tandem could really plow through the game at times. It took us just two gaming sessions to approach level 70 and defeat Nightmare Baal (with several pauses for upgrading the twink gear). As the project progressed we saw that getting three SP D2’ers online at the same time could sometimes prove difficult.
-Deaths were few and far between. We had a bit of trouble in Nightmare when we were biting off more than we could chew. This was in part because we had sped through the beginning game so (relatively) quickly. For the most part though, we did a good job at looking out for one another.
-I will never again attempt to host this many screenshots.
-These characters are dripping in more awesomeness than a pair of the Fonz’s briefs. (Gross)
Thanks
-Zylo and Ray Patean, for agreeing to this project and being so enthusiastic about it. Good show.
-Dark Chaos, gedda-d-e, and sirpoopsalot for a couple of nice throwing items that helped Madawc make it through the game.
-cloudy, just out of habit.
-Zylo also thanks Ipsilantee and Cygnus for various wares.
-Ray thanks his parents for blessing him with such righteous genes.
TL
R ConclusionBy incorporating teammates, I took the usual Liq bar and raised it by a factor of three. Didn’t think it could be done? Well believe it. This thread is saturated in so much awesome that this post alone would be able to sustain an entire army of breast-powered robots.
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