Diablo II: The Movie... what characters would you choose?

The story writers at Blizz are excellent so there's bound to be plenty of good dark backgrounds. However, you have to consider precedents:

Amazon - People haven't gotten over the Xena stereotype/craze. However, she'll make a totally awesome competition group. A fight between the char's party and an amazon would make for lots of cool tactical and awesome Bow-play.

Barbarian - Ahnold smash! My name ist Das Rock! I pwn joo! Big swords, axes, lots of grunting and power, but given how the Rock portrayed and Arnold played things, you'll be looking at fairly boring main Char. However, a Barbarian would make the AWESOMEST Little John side character. Little Jon in the Diablo universe = win!

Paladin - Blizzard already spends way too much time and effort on Paladins. Plz, no more. An evil Paladin boss or an emo, fallen Paladin would make for a fairly good companion char though.

Sorceress - No thanks. Tolkien was right to sparingly use Magic in his books. The way a Sorceress goes about using magic would make for poor emersion. However, fighting a Sorceress would make for crazy FX.

Necromancer - The same goes for a Necromancer. However, having him as cynical commentator would make for some funny dialog. Best role would be to play the role of competition boss.

Assassin - I would pay to watch this movie. There would be no spoken dialog from her. All she would do is set up traps, kill demons with Jet Li-esque choreographed martial arts, and tell the story from a very dark side.

Druid - hehe, I'd pay to watch this movie. People will know him as Al Gore, his birth name is Perrin t'Bashere, and his spiritual name is Mad Max. He listens to Nature, plants, and animals. He travels with a pack, but you will only see one wolf with him at anytime. He doesn't like to fight, but he'll transform into a wolf when he has contemplated no other way. When he's enraged, he'll transform into a HUGE manbear and knock things around.
 
Druid - hehe, I'd pay to watch this movie. People will know him as Al Gore, his birth name is Perrin t'Bashere, and his spiritual name is Mad Max. He listens to Nature, plants, and animals. He travels with a pack, but you will only see one wolf with him at anytime. He doesn't like to fight, but he'll transform into a wolf when he has contemplated no other way. When he's enraged, he'll transform into a HUGE manbear and knock things around.

Nice one.

"You called my wolf fat?" *transforms to wolf* Roarrr!
"What??! My tail is tiny??!" *transforms to bear* ROAARR!!



 
This is easy. They already made a Diablo movie...its called the Lord of the Rings.

The main character would be a zealot paladin. Somebody who is into truth, justice and is very noble. He would be in love with a...

Bowazon. The female lead. A typical amazonian type tomboy. Of course, he would have sidekicks such as the...

hardheaded frenzy barb. He is the musclebound, meathead who questions all of the zealot pally's orders and provides all of the comic relief in the movie, which leads us to the...

tragic hammerdin pally. the tragic sidekick of course is the best friend of the main character who you know is going to die eventually

Of course you cant have a story like this without a sage guide, in this case we have a light sorc, (think Christopher Lambert's Raiden mixed with Ian Mckellen's Gandalf)...we then go to the

Mystery allegiance MA Assassin. Starting out we don't know which side he is on...he will even get into a fight with our hero at the beginning of the movie (the fight will end in a draw, with the Assassin exclaiming "we will meet again"), eventually of course we find out the Sin is noble and will probably end up bailing out our herioc group at some point during the movie.

In this movie, not all of D2s characters are good. Our main villian is a summoner necro, attempting to the recover sacred organ pieces to resurrect and control Baal. Of course...nobody could really control Baal, silly necro. At the Necro's disposal we have the

complicated secondary bad guy. The complicated secondary bad guy, is a bad guy who disagrees with the main bad guy and actually may end up helping our heroes in the end. In this movie our secondary bad guy is a resurrected Elemental druid. The druid has been resurrected by our main bad guy and must now do his bidding, whether he agrees with him or not

we must also have a bad guy who is blindly loyal to the main bad guy and is evil to the core, this will be played by an exiled paladin ranger. he was part of the pally order but was exiled because ranger pallys are so lame. He, of course, will be killed in the most gruesome, crowd pleasing way. Probably a swift decapitation or a 50 foot fall into a bed of spikes.

The Cast:
I will refrain from using the Lord of the Rings cast, although you very easily could.

The Zealot - Hugh Jackman
The Bowazon - Jessica Biel
The Frenzy Barb - Gerard Butler
Hammerdin - Liam Neeson
The Light Sorc - Kenneth Brannagh
The Necro - Gary Oldman
The Druid - Colin Firth
The Ranger -Cliff Curtis
 
You know, I'd be highly surprised if characters in a Diablo movie used any of their skills with any regularity, because the more you use any one trick, the cheaper it begins to feel. I'd expect most of the fighting to be Lord of the Rings style hack, shoot and slash done by all characters, with the heroes busting out the crazy guns (shapeshifting, Frozen Orb, Claws of Thunder, Bone Spear, Whirlwind, Holy Bolt, Guided Arrow, anything with a strong visual aspect) at various but uncommon dramatic moments. I'd also expect some new tricks that can't really be modeled by in-game skills, personally...one of the silliest things that I can think of is that Druids get only two shapeshifting forms. I mean, come on...
 
Thunder needs to stop with the paradoxes. "Complicated" "English" hardy har har gotta love being ignorant. I don't think Colin Firth is THAT bad, but I highly doubt he would be halfway decent in regards to complicated good and evil. I say...Christopher Walken for every single character except for the bowzon, who shall be Orlando Bloom, in his normal female role, and the assassin, who will be Hagrid, not the actor, the person, and the light-sorc shall be Shaq.
 
'Aint Barb the best choice for the main char? (the last act and everything).
Druid for the semi bad guy, (related the the main char) who will turn good after some events.
Assasin for the semi good girl (will turn evil after some events). Assasins are still the "good" group in the Diablo univers.
Paladin = Evil!! i mean c'mon! "We must smash the evil with out hammer of justice!" Ofc he's evil..
Necro is the super power bad guy (who will win! Power to the undead!).
When i hear "sorceres".. I'm thinking of Lina Invers (the Slayers) "fireball!" Boom! everything is dead. So no thanks.
The Amazon is alot like Xena..(So she's in love with the sorc/assa. For better plot).
And yes! Mr.Connery for the role of Cain.
 
Mickey Rourke would make a great Barbarian...
 
I figured a sword wielding barb would make a good main character a la Conan. He beats the badguys using skill and toughness rather than armour and magical skills. I do like the sword wielding knight in shining armour (see avatar on left :wink3:), but they are just too common in movies.

The frail sorc with skills that fry the cannonfodder (but badguy boss is immune to) would make a good sidekick.
 
Cathy Bates as Akara, longingly looking at her old breastplate on the armor rack, wondering if she can even fit in it.:laugh: I agree that magic casting should be kept to a minimum, maybe the necro should be a bit of a bungler. How about Johnny Depp?
I like the idea of the Druid lacking fighting skills unless transformed. I wonder what Brandon Frazer would look like with a beard and dreads?
 
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