*cuddles BPC*
That means I had to randomly jump in your car.
I'm officially stressed. It's just too many challenges have come around the same time, and I haven't had enough time to relax and let them go or deal with them yet.
I'm at the point where I'm either suppressing some memories, or creating fake memories. Last night, I would have vehemently argued with my boss that I was not informed of the work that was supposedly on today. I would have brought up examples of where things were unclear, and why I believed that I was not informed - including the fact that I would have objected due to being asked to work away from home tonight - I would have argued because my plan was to go to aikido tonight.
This morning, I ran through it again (obvious signs I'm stressed, as my mind went straight to that when I woke up,) and I have a very faint, unclear new memory. Something that wasn't there last night. I can't remember exactly what it is, but if that memory is true, I was informed - it's not a complete memory though - it's fragmented, unclear, and uncertain. I don't know if it happened, or if it's just something my mind has created. But the memory is that I was informed, and began to object to working away tonight, but reluctantly accepted it, because I was given significant notice. It's not like normal memories where I know it happened. It's just (hard to explain,) it's there, but not like I can relive/move through what happened at that time.
If that barely-a-memory memory is true, I couldn't remember it. I suppressed it, or overlapped it with other memories, so that I couldn't recall it. That means my boss is right, and I should have gone to work and given more notice of taking the day off. But it also means I'm right! I'm worn out to the point where I'm overwriting and suppressing memories.
If I'm right, and I wasn't informed (which I still somewhat believe, as that 'memory' may just be a fake memory created to try to make things make sense,) then it doesn't mean I'm not stressed, as last week I was suffering.
[/rant]
*cuddles GT*
Are these new discussions and decisions, or have these things been coming around for a while now?